television. tool of the devil.

so, we've been watching dexter on showtime for the past two months or so now, and although at the outset i thought it was against my better judgement to get involved with a story line about a sympathetic serial killer, i basically had no choice. those showtime people are good, and twisted just the same as we are, apparently.

but now we've inevitably come to the part where i am gonna get screwed by television, once again. this happened to me before, with a little show called six feet under. perhaps you've heard of it? here's the deal. next sunday night, dexter's season finale is going to be off the fucking chain, off the dog, what have you, and at the very last moment, when it gets to the point where everything is completely fucked up and crazy and what the viewer needs more than anything is some sort of resolution so that they can go back to their regular life, which they have unwisely tangled up with the life of a fictional, sympathetic serial killer on a premium cable channel, they are going to cut to the credits. and what will that mean, my friends? well, it will mean that they will not let us in on what happens next until NEXT FUCKING FALL. because that's how these douchebag premium cable channels work. balls.

i mean, how can i be expected to keep my connection to this show intact for an entire year? i have lived in four different apartments in the last year, for christssake. i am, by nature, a drifter. and while i will not drift from this apartment perhaps ever, i will certainly drift to other television programs, because this is FUCKING RIDICULOUS. next fall? really? that's just wrong.

and so getting back to the six feet under analogy, despite the fact that i loved that show, and i managed to hang in there pretty religiously for two seasons(and the fucking year in between), i eventually had to kick the habit, 'cause i just couldn't say for sure that i would be able to commit to it next YEAR. who the hell knows what i will be into next year? maybe i will have a new show to watch on sunday nights at ten. maybe i will be doing stem cell research at columbia presbyterian in preparation for my entrance to yale on sunday nights at ten. who is to say?

fuck you, showtime. i loved your new series. and this is how you act.